What traits makes a great parent? In my book they include patience,
fairness, flexibility, firmness and unconditional love. As a single mother,
I know how just how hard it is. I remember my pediatrician told me when I
was particularly exasperated when my son was going through the terrible twos
that the only difference between a loving parent and a child abuser was we
thought about it but they actually did it.
In addition to the psychological component, there is a physiological
component to good parenting. It is the trace mineral manganese. Long called
"the mothering nutrient", manganese levels provide telling biological clues
about your feelings toward both your children and your parents.
Aminal studies have deprived mice of manganese until they suffered a
deficiency. This biochemical imbalance severely impaired their reproductive
ability. What's worse, the mice who did have litters totally ignored and
refused to nurture their young. But, when their manganese levels improved,
they took more interest in mothering.
In humans, a manganese deficiency causes defective ovulation and ovarian
degeneration in females and testicular degeneration in males. Increased
infant mortality occurs when the mother lacks manganese during pregnancy.
Quite a few of my customers have a manganese shortage when I look at their
Tissue Mineral Analysis results. (The TMA is a clinical lab test performed
by a federally licensed lab that charts 35 trace elements and heavy metals.
Meltdown sells this test, performed by one of 13 chartered labs in America.)
When I talk to them about their children, a whole lot of them are either not
particularly interested in their children's welfare or seem overwhelmed by
the whole parenting process.
You can have too much manganese and be a bad parent, too. Mild manganese
toxicity causes insomnia, mental excitement and compulsive actions.
I'll guarantee you the Milwaukee father who severely beat his son last year
because he was bothering him while he watched the Dallas-Green Bay game on
TV was real short on manganese.
Alcoholics are more prone to manganese toxicity than others. And people with
excessive manganese levels also tend to be toxic with iron, too. Too much
iron can cause volcanic, irrational rages. I'll bet OJ had too much iron and
manganese on that fateful night.
Interestingly, some people have none of these symptoms yet are toxic with
manganese. When I visit with them, I discover many had some disastrous
emotional event with a parent. In addition to abuse, a singular event can
cause the toxicity.
In one case, a father gave a mortgage free house to his daughter and her
husband as a wedding present. After a few years, he and his daughter got
into a minor quarrel. He then sold the house even though he didn't need the
money, even though the couple was about to have their first child and the
husband had just been laid off. Not a real good time to be put out on the
street. The daughter was quite angry about this and it caused her manganese
levels to rise and remain stubbornly high.
After a couple years of therapy, she was able to resolve the situation in
her mind. She was strong enough to repair her relationship with her father.
Thereafter, the couple miraculously found a fixer-upper in Los Angeles that
was perfect for them and bought their own home, one that no one (but the
bank!) could take away from them. Soon after they moved in, her TMA showed a
marked decrease in manganese.
How do you fix a manganese deficiency or toxicity? Each is easily fixable
(assuming the problem is not emotional) becaus tissue manganese levels are
directly related to the substance's availability in the diet. Fresh
vegetables are high in manganese. However, a vegetarian diet does not
necessarily improve manganese levels.
Meat, on the other hand, is not a good source of manganese. But scientific
studies have found that subjects eating a high protein diet have a healthier
manganese status than those eating a diet low in protein. That's because
meat enhances the bio-availability of manganese. Therefore, eating meat --
or any lean protein (fish, poultry without the skin, eggs, white meat pork)
with fresh vegetables ensures that the body will be able to absorb enough
manganese.
Although tea is rich in manganese, it is unavailable for absorption because
of the tannin content of the drink. Alcohol, on the other hand, increases
the liver's manganese level and apparently doubles it absorption.
Nutrition has a very powerful effect on emotions. If you have children, you
have a strong responsibility to eat yourself patient! Get that manganese in
the zone.
Freud once said ignorance is no excuse for dumb behavior. In the Meltdown
interpretation of those words, ignorance is a choice we make to prevent
ourselves from making difficult changes in our lives even though we really
know better. Now you have no excuse not to get healthy!